It had to have been one of the most ridiculous things I had ever heard, but you have to consider that these folks were beyond deluded, and they helped me realize how some people just operate under a different set of rules altogether. When I was in college, my now-husband was in a band, and these people wanted to help him and his band. That was fine in itself, but it created a load of problems. The first clue I encountered was that they had cut all of the bass players out of the pictures of bands they had hanging on their wall. Weird right?

When I asked them about this, they told me that as far as they were concerned, bass players were worthless, and no band needed them. I was stunned when they said this, and wondered why they had come up with this stupid theory. My first guess was that they knew absolutely nothing about music. How could they say bass players were not needed if they knew anything about how a band creates a sound? Sadly, this wasn’t my only clue they were demented. They tried to talk my husband into insuring his hands, and one of their friends went on a rampage trying to break us apart. Over all, I felt like I had stumbled into some weird alternate universe.

They wouldn’t waver in their believe that bass players were not needed, and it got more bizarre from then on out. One night at two in the morning, there was a knock on my door. The male part of this ridiculous outfit was standing at my door claiming there was an emergency and he need to see my boyfriend right away. Half asleep and confused, we followed him down the hallway of our dorm apartment building thinking that if this had anything to do with bass players I was going to punch him in the face.

When we got to this guy’s apartment, he turned on his CD player and my boyfriend’s band’s CD started to play. My boyfriend and I looked at each other in confusion and I started to get really angry. Then he pushed play on his VCR and a video recording of the same song played. His emergency was what? He went on to inform us that the song on the CD is slower than how they play it live. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I said, “Are you insane or just utterly stupid?” and we left and went back to bed. They were soon out of our lives, and I didn’t have to worry about the fate of my husband’s bass player anymore. I was sure he was a target for their idiocy.